Stay outta jail!

The entire time I was growing up, my Dad would encourage us to stay out of jail as we left the house. It was a light-hearted connection I had with my Dad, and it meant something to me. To the average person looking in, it may have been a bit cruel, but even as I would leave the house in my teenage years, I would have to tell my Dad I would stay outta jail. I was a good kid. My parents could trust my brother and I, so it wasn't a harsh thing, it was a special thing to me. I don't know if I ever told my Dad it was cool, as that may not have been "cool", but it was cool to me. I was (and still am) enormously blessed. I wasn't abused, neglected, or anything by my parents. I had good parents, who acted like adults, and did a great job of raising me.

So last year my class did, "I like you" as our inside joke. You can get to the site if you click on the right hand side of this blog on the "I like you" link. We still do this in my class, and they love it when we do it now because we don't do it very much at all anymore. But this year I started a new phrase...."Stay outta jail." At first it was a joke, and everyone laughed. The scary thing is, for some of these kids, I really mean it. They don't have what I had growing up. And, some of them are already problem children without parents who are adults at home. So, stay outta jail sort of became my motto for the year...until yesterday...

I have a student, Alex, who had been absent two days in a row, and I was concerned about him. He is a bit ADHD, so in some respects the break was good for me. He's a good kid though. If he has his sensory stuff with him, he's a good kid. So, he was back yesterday and first thing in the morning I was notified that Alex needed to talk to me. I knew his class had a field trip, so I figured we'd catch up after the trip. Well, I went by his room, and his regular education teacher said that he didn't have the permission slip so he wasn't going.

I just stared.
What?
I blinked and looked at her.
What?
So I said, "Did you call Dad? He'll let him go."
She looked at me and said, "No, I didn't let any of mine call. They should have brought it back by today."

The kid had been absent the past two days!
I just stared at her.
Thought bubble: What? You've got to be kidding me!
I looked at her, and said, "I think this is one you can make an exception for."
And I said this, not knowing where he'd been the past two days.
She looked at me and said, "Well, with all his drama the past few days, he should just stay here."
What?
What drama?
Stay here? My kids always go on trips!
I looked at her, and said, "Okay, may I see Alex in the hall?"
She said, "sure".

I wasn't sure what to think. I had never, in my 8 years of teaching, had a teacher not let one of my kids call for permission to go on a trip. I'll be the first to admit, my kids typically forget their slips, so calling is a normal thing, but this kid had been gone the past 2 days. What followed made me question this teacher even more.

I pulled Alex in the hall...and has it turned out, his parents were in jail the past 2 days and they hadn't been at school because Grandma was afraid the authorities would take them away.

Yeah, his parents had been in jail.

At what moment in time did the kid have time to say, "Hey Dad, can you sign this so I can go on a field trip?"
His Dad was in jail...

So, I stopped in my tracks.
In jail?
What?
Doesn't matter the charge against the parents, the kid was visably upset and not going on the field trip was going to be even worse for this kid.
I looked at him and said, "Alex, do you want to go on the field trip?"
He said yes, but his teacher wouldn't let him because he didn't have the flippin' slip!

I was pissed. Frustrated. Flabbergasted.
I sent him back to class and told the teacher I was calling Dad.
I didn't ask.
I just did it.
You know what?
His Dad was incredibly appreciative that I called and didn't let his mistake hold his kid back.
I walked back to class and told the teacher that Alex was going.
He smiled when I told him he could go.
He was still upset today, and wouldn't talk, but at least he went on the field trip.
I can't fix everything, but I can fix that...

But in light of this, I'm going back to, "I like you."

I think it's safer...

Later!